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Recently I had to cancel a weekend headlining at one of my favorite clubs because I received an offer to open for a national touring comedian at sold out theaters. While the club is one of my favorites, its a smaller room where my fans and friends like to see me. The theaters are sold out and the pay is significantly more than the club. More importantly, the theater shows place me in front of thousands of people who don’t know me. Nobody likes to cancel a show. I don’t have a manager or agent to help me navigate these tough decisions but I know last time I had a similar situation, I was afraid to cancel a weekend when offered a bigger opportunity so I didn't. I regretted it and missed out on other opportunities as a result. I have had to cancel a handful of times before with results that always went better than I expected. When the identical opportunity presented itself before and I was booked at a club, the owner was actually happy for me and excited for the opportunity I received. That owner pointed out how she was rooting for me and that if I gain followers, it will be that much easier to sell out when I return to that venue. Valid point. In this situation, I knew the club owner would be upset with me, but I figured since it was over two months away, he would have ample opportunity to re-schedule and limited promotions had started by the club and me. I even offered up other weekends I was open to re-schedule. He was livid. Not only that, he called me unprofessional and told me basically he would never work with me again. I tried to point out how it was more than two months away; he would not listen. He clearly took it personally, even though I love his club and have supported it for years. As a former booker myself, I know how hard it is when someone cancels, but in this situation, it was not last minute and I would never fault an artist for taking a huge opportunity. I tried to explain like “What if I got a late night spot on the Tonight Show and had to cancel, would that be okay?” and he was not having any of it. I know that I am professional and I handled the conversation calmly and with reason but the owner was so emotionally charged. I am lucky to have personal experience in the entertainment industry (my prior life as an Artist Manager and lawyer) to know I did nothing wrong but I know younger comedians don't have that. I thought about all the times I told my legal clients to wait 24 hours before responding to something to avoid letting your emotions navigate the conversation. In the end, I made the right decision and handled the difficult call the best I could. Hopefully, I can be back at the club but I won’t hold my breath. Hope to see you in Denver, Dallas, Tulsa and Sarasota this month and at the Improv on October 3rd. #standup #careerchange #formerlawyer #artistmanagement 
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As a creator and producer, I often have to employ third parties to assist me with tasks like filming or editing and also sometimes need other comedians to be on a show. Lately I have noticed a trend of non-response. I had someone working with me somewhat consistently for nearly six months who just simply stopped responding to scheduling texts and emails. Similarly, I had sent out a few offers for shows I was producing to comedians who also just never responded, even when asked for a response within a certain time frame. In the dating world, it's called "ghosting" and it's becoming more and more acceptable in the professional world. It shouldn't be. I believe, unless the situation or person is toxic or the contact is abusive or offensive , there is absolutely no reason not to respond to someone in a business setting. The limited level of energy to response with a "no thank you" or "I can't do this work anymore. Sorry" should be mandatory. Perhaps they are worried about a confrontation or are too fragile to seal with conflict. While in some situations, it could be a waste of time to even respond, it is frustrating to people and job creators who are trying to grow, professionally and maybe personally. I know this has become accepted with Gen Z and it shouldn't be. Being able to communicate with others, even if you don't "want" to seems like something we all should be able to do. Perhaps you don't agree with someone or no longer enjoy the person or the setting, but an explanation goes a long way towards helping the person, and maybe yourself. Maybe you read the situation wrong or the offer you thought was "so offensive" actually was missing a "0"). Who knows. You can't be too busy to draft a response. If you can't communicate this to others, you are doing yourself and others a disservice in the long run. #standup #genz #growth  I have been watching this show "The Dark Side of Comedy" on Vice which highlights comedians who had a horrible death, a debilitating illness or a hidden darkness that the public did not know about. I highly recommend it for comedy fans. It seems very common in comedy to expect that from those of us trying to bring joy to the world. Some of us use comedy as a coping mechanism to deal with our sadness or darkness. A lot of comedians were not dark on stage but rather, had their own demons there chased when they got off stage. Lately I have been talking more about the "darker" aspects of my life, which is hard to do as a comedian, especially when a crowd is not expecting it. I love dark comedians like Anthony Jeselnick and when I started comedy, I was very influenced by him and lately I have been going back to darker material. Its been fun to push the envelope and add the edges to my otherwise clean comedy sets. Exploring new material is always fun, especially when it works. #comedy #standup #careerchange photo by Joe Loiselle  I had my first TRUE heckler. Not a drunk heckler or someone talking during my set but a person who was clearly angry and unhappy with me. The crowd was very "tight" and quiet during the host and feature set before I got on, so I knew I had my work cut out for me. I started by poking fun of the crowd for being mean to the comedians and then their small city. They laughed as a group and I thought we were off to the races. Then I did some of the "hits" and they were a little quiet, which is when I usually go into the crowd and do some crowd work. I don't know what I did to offend him but I noticed an older man "mean mugging" me within minutes of my set. As comedians, we always focus on the one person who is not having fun. I don't know why but I know we all do it. After ten minutes and the hits not working very well, I decided to talk to him and ask him a VERY benign question about his glasses. He did not answer. He just kept staring at me. So I laughed at the weirdness of not wanting to answer questions and the crowd laughed. Then he verbally attacked me and said "Why don't you say something funny, you haven't yet!" The crowd made shocked noises so I asked him why he was so mad. He warned me not to "start with him" so I then went to another person and asked the same question, when they answered right away, I poked fun at how easy a question it was to answer and how I was not trying to pick a fight. He was triggered. We went back and forth but I was clearly thrown off my game. Not just because of the mean things he said but also because, well, the crowd was now even quieter than before. Self-doubt took over. I was trying to asses the situation to find a happy way out, even though I could easily have him kicked out. My goal was to make him laugh and confront him with "see I am funny" diffuse the situation so I did "sure fire" jokes. He was still mad and still not laughing. The crowd also was a little rattled by the whole situation. Later he kept talking (not to me but to his table) during my set so I told him to shut up and when he refused, he was kicked out. The club and staff handled it well as they also had never experienced anything like that before either. Seinfeld says he still thinks about a mean heckler for 30 years ago and I hope that doesn't happen to me. I don't understand how someone can be mad at a person who is trying to bring joy and laughter to the audience. Perhaps he didn't like one of my jokes about my race or something I said politically before offended him, although I didn't really do anything too controversial or political. (I know that politically we did not align) It did provide a humbling moment for me to remember that a show can go south very quickly. The silver lining is that my camera was rolling so I will edit a clip for all to see shortly, so follow me on Instagram to see it! But, I have to admit, going back to watch it has been tough. #standup #comedy  I am a podcaster. I was fortunate enough to start a podcast when there was not 1 million of them (just 100k) 7 years ago. I originally started the podcast, Singles Only, to promote my show about a topic that was a big part of my life, being single. My mentor at the time told me podcasts would be the way to promote myself. It worked. But I also got to hear other people's stories and struggled and it was an added benefit I did not even think about when I started the podcast. Last year, I ended that podcast - Singles Only - to start a new endeavor to interview people who are night owls like me. While there is not as many people who fall into that category, it is something I am passionate about. I like to hear what other people do late at night and how other creatives create. The added bonus is that I sometimes learn to try new methods I can also incorporate into my process and identify my own bad habits in others to try to perhaps change my own behaviors. All while also hanging out with some of the funniest and talented people in the world. It's been so fun so far to do the interviews but also frustrating to find a larger audience, like I did with Singles Only. We are only 33 episodes in. Hopefully that will change soon. Check it out if you need a laugh, are a night owl or a fan of comedy. This week's episode was a silly one with up and coming comedian Claire Sundbye from Topeka Kansas. #podcasting hashtag#process hashtag#comedian hashtag#formerlawyer  |
AuthorPaul Farahvar is a comedian hailing from Chicago, Ill. Archives
August 2024
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